Marian Budos
Lost illusions
Music Credits: Composer: Marian Budos
Producer Credits: Recording: Slovak National Radio
Performance Credits: Jan Labant: classical guitar & Marian Budos: semi-acoustic guitar
Short Song Description:
A driving, impetuous pulse dominates this emotional and sometimes stormy piece from start to finish.
Story Behind the Song:
October 1995: The one I thought would always love me has left without word or explanation, suspending my emotions in an already dark cloud of distrust and uncertainty. Somewhere amidst wrestling with my own demons I wrote this piece. My friend, Anthony Field had already asked me to write him something, but I wonder if he realised what heavy burden I would be unloading on him? Completely at the mercy of emotion, I was unable to write with the usual sense of discipline. Both guitars run as though they are trying to catch each other. Although I struggle to recall how I felt then, hearing those rushing guitars occasionally reminds me how desperately hard I worked to chase away sadness. I felt as though the world would fall on me if I stopped. I only realised after I finished that it wasn't as bad as all that. By the end of the piece a small theme; a strand of hope emerged and I realised that writing the piece had transported me to a better place. It reminded me of Honneger's 2nd symphony with the lone trumpet at the end.
Song Length: 5:19
Primary Genre: Unique-Unclassified
Secondary Genre: Classical-Contemporary
Tempo: Fast (151 - 170)
Subject Matter 1: Breaking Up
Subject Matter 2: Anger
Mood 1: Frantic
Mood 2: Moving